Okay, so let’s get the disclaimer out of the way right up front. I write cozy mysteries, with almost zero romance, so I can’t promise you’ll wake up to the love of your life on December twenty-fifth after a whirlwind courtship and a candlelit Christmas Eve wedding, performed (or at least arranged) by Santa.
Sorry about that. I can’t even guarantee you a decent date for New Year’s Eve.
Of course, you may already have that perfect holiday someone. But maybe you haven’t had a chance to appreciate each other enough lately, with those dual glamorous, high-powered careers or heartbreaking childhood memories or impossible family complications that leave you too exhausted or frazzled or disillusioned for love. So sad.
Decadent chocolates, long bubble baths and wine on IV drip fail to cheer as you ponder the dismal shortage of available soulmates? Hopefully you have a fulfilling hobby to take your mind off that hidden heartbreak. For instance...
You love to bake Christmas cookies. Millions and zillions, worthy of five Martha stars. Or maybe you sketch wedding gowns or plan other brides’ weddings or rescue adorably fuzzy kittens and puppies or collect glittering crystal ornaments or angel music boxes.
No? Okay, let's try this: The minute those Turkey Day dishes are done, you spend every waking moment after work for weeks scouring your super-clean, festively bustling city for the perfect Christmas tree—but once discovered, you immediately turn it over to the handsome stranger with the adorable kids who finds it at the exact same time. (Niece and nephew, as it turns out. Phew!)
None of these scenarios ring a Christmas bell? Hmm. Maybe you haven’t found the partner of your dreams because you’re an uber-focused career gal slaving for an overly demanding (but undeniably charming) CEO in that same fabulous, but oh-so-lonely-at-the-holidays city.
Or you’re the sweet girl next door in an adorably-themed town that makes Mayberry look downright sketchy, and you’ve got your hands full with a mysterious newcomer who keeps shaking up your snow globe world (literally, it’s a snow globe). If you’re super lucky, he’ll turn out to be Mr. Right. Worst case, he’s some kind of twinkly-eyed, interfering Secret Santa.
Of course, there is one more, perfectly likely reason you have no romantic prospects in sight this Christmas. You’re a princess! You know what that means, right? You can’t tell anyone you know. Maybe you just found out you have royal blood, so you’re still getting used to the idea, as well as the tiny, festively decorated castle designed for Grace Kelly. Or maybe you were casually dating a clean-cut, impeccably-mannered guy with a vague British accent—and he’s bringing you home to meet his disapproving parents.
Gosh, I hope all you romantic hopefuls out there won’t think I’m trying to crumble your Christmas cookies here. I’m just being super cautious, because it’d be a shame to trash that whole poinsettia bouquet deal too soon. And maybe--just maybe—your holiday love story will work out.
Why? Because Christmas is magic, that one special time of year when all your dreams can come true. You’ve got seventeen days left til December twenty-fifth--and remember, Santa always comes through.
Maybe I'll add a little romance to my next mystery. Definitely after the holidays, though, because there's no way I'm tearing myself away from this TV and Costco-sized pallet of Kleenex.